100-day Diary–Changing Complaining Habit
I caught myself complaining to people (not close friends) on the downsides of my working place again. Although all the downsides are true. Complaining to people who may or may not have sympathetic years do not seem to help me other than the fuzzy feeling that I have a listener.
Many of these complaints are just “negative thoughts” jumping out of my brain. I am now aware of this habit–perhaps I picked it up unconsciously from family members. I have been paying high prices for this bad habit, career setbacks etc.
I am now have the self-awareness moments after negative thoughts jump out of me. OK, I only need to take a breath and let these negative thoughts stay a mili-second longer in thoughts form, not word.
It is OK. I can certainly change myself for better, a better person to be around.
When things start to bother me, I will do this:
- Meditate daily
- Are the negative thoughts justified? If not, let them go like clouds dissipating with wind. If yes, think of solutions to the problems that cause negative thoughts.
If there are no solutions, being bothered by them would not help either, so let them go like smoke blowing away by wind.
Accept imperfection. Let it be. Like the old Chinese man who lost a horse. Perhaps unfortunateness is just fortunate in disguise. - Start to clean the house or closet, or go out for a walk if I cannot drive unwanted thoughts away. When body is busy, negative thoughts will lose their stream.